Sunday, December 31, 2006
Happy New Year!!!!
Thursday, December 28, 2006
Wednesday, December 20, 2006
Pet Peeves...on a bad day
* "Have a Happy Period." Are you kidding me? I just know it was a man that came up with that particular ad gem. And every time I notice it, I happen to be on my "happy" period & inches from homicidal. Which of course relates us back to the dumb people I mentioned earlier.
* Morning people. Just because you feel the need to have a conversation before a cup of coffee doesn't mean the rest of us do. So zip it, or prepare to be harmed.
I'm sure I have more. But I just can't be bothered today.
HAVE A HAPPY PERIOD!!!!!
Monday, December 18, 2006
Sneaked Up on Me Again This Year...
So Christmas is fast approaching & am I ready? Of course not!!! Every year is the same. I start planning in Nov & never get anything done until the week before. I don't even have all my Christmas cards written. Though, in my defense, I do have a lot of Christmas cards to write (48 to be precise). and I copt out a bit this year & sent e-cards to about another 20, mostly to avoid the hassle of tracking down addresses. So I don't feel too bad about the cards, I have about half of them sent, (pat on the back). I've got to edit that card list next year, really I do, it just keeps getting bigger. Pretty soon I'll be all year just writing cards. As for gifts, it'll be January before anyone at home gets my gifts because I don't even have them in the mail yet. And that's a shame because a few of them are kinda seasonal. So mom's not going to get to use her Santa plates until next year. Not to worry, she'll understand, where do you think I got my procrastinating ways.
Saturday, December 16, 2006
Retail Therapy
I don't have an unlimited disposable income. I don't think I have any disposable income actually. But I do however, on occasion, like to pretend. I'll admit, sometimes pretending becomes buying. But usually its just pretending. Every once in a while I get the almost uncontrollable urge to just shop. The last time I got the urge was in Vancouver, Robson St, almost a year ago. Well, pretending didn't quite work that day, 2 hours & $1200 later, I felt purged. Unfortunately, I don't work the high seas anymore. I can't spend $$$ like I actually have it. I shouldn't have really done it then either, but I did.
Friday, December 15, 2006
Monday, December 11, 2006
DECEMBER 10
What makes a person stop?
Do they just wake up one morning & think, 'this is far enough, I refuse to go any further'?
Is it a conscious choice?
Is there doubt?
My brother Michael died 2 years ago yesterday. Truthfully, he didn't 'die' he killed himself. I haven't talked about him in those years, not even to my family. I try not to even think about him. I think I might hate him. I don't want to, but I think I might. And I have no idea how to make that stop.
Sometimes I dream about him. We're driving in a car, I don't recognize the scenery but it's beautiful. I get out of the car to take a photo of a sea view & when I turn around he has driven off without me. He just drives off & leaves me stranded in this place I don't know.
Sometimes we're in an old house. There are dozens of people around, I stop to admire a painting on the wall & when I turn around he's gone. I catch him going down a spiral stair case. I try to follow him but I can't catch up. The stairs seem to descend forever, there's just no end to them. An old woman tells me not to bother. She tells me I'll never catch him where he's going. Whenever I have this dream I always wake up crying. I had it a few times before I could remember it well enough to get why I was crying. I get it now.
I never mention him to my family. They all rushed home for the funeral, had him buried on church ground, next to dad.
I've studied suicide. I'm more than familiar with all the psychological reasoning. I know all the theories of depression, chemical imbalances, psychotic breaks, & on & on & on. None of it matters. The truth is he quit the game half way through & left the rest of us holding the cards.
I've never been one to hold a grudge. I know better than some the freedom you can find in forgiveness. But sometimes when a grudge is all you have, its just all you have. And there's no resolution to be found if you ask me. You can't argue with the wind.
Wednesday, December 06, 2006
Good-Bye My Love
I am most possibly the dumbest smart person I know. I'm just absent minded. I forget simply tasks & fumble my way through most days. Ask me about the Gross National Product, International Immigration Laws or even the root of Pi and I'm on the ball. Really, I am. But in day to day functioning, I'm a mess.
Tuesday, December 05, 2006
The God Gene???
A God gene? Could there be such a thing? A researcher in Maryland thinks 'yes'. Dr Dean Hamer, Ph.D., has discovered a gene called VMAT2 that comes in two forms. One of those forms may help us to experience transcendent occurrences, like feeling the presence of God. VMAT2 controls feel-good chemicals, like serotonin & dopamine. Dr. Hamer thinks that this same family of chemicals prime us for religious experiences. Dr. Hamer estimates that about 50% of people have the God gene.
I've been searching for God, spiritual connectedness, the Truth, the 'I don't know what really', for as long as I can remember. I don't know why I do & I have no I idea where or when my fascination with the Divine began. I only know that its always seemed to be there. Could it be possible that I am just genetically predisposed to search for God?
True religion is real living; living with all one's soul, with all one's goodness and righteousness.
Monday, December 04, 2006
National Day of the Artisan
Today is Mexico's National Day of the Artisan. A day to celebrate the social & cultural contributions of its artists & creative thinkers. I like the idea of having a day to appreciate the work & contributions that artists make in our lives. And they do, whether we realize it or not. They often challenge the percieved 'status quo'. Or help to pass on history, traditions & cultural integrity to newer generations.
The names of the worlds great artists have become part of our vocabulary. You don't have to be an art history major to know who Michelangelo was or that we owe the Sistine chapel to his outrageous talent. Andy Warhol practically defined New York in the 70's & through into the 80's. His work helped to erase the distinction between fine art & popular culture. Actually, you can thank Andy for the entire concept of "pop-culture".
Sunday, December 03, 2006
Starbucks wins back another one
Yes it's so true. I broke down. I'm weak. 7 months without one cup of joe & now 5 cups in the last 2 days. I just needed it O.K!!! I know caffeine is the devil but it keeps me awake & stops me from harming others & I don't think that's such a bad thing really. I have come to the conclusion that coffee is just a necessary evil. I've made peace with my weakness. 3 cheers Juan Valdez!
Saturday, December 02, 2006
Check Mate?
This just in: The World Chess Federation has decided to introduce dope testing. Chess + Dope testing !!!Testing for what exactly, Gingo Bilobo? I don't think there is a steroid out there that enhances brain activity. I'm not a scientist, I've run no tests. I do however go to the gym. Therefore I do interact with these neck less buffoons. And as bad as I am at chess, I'd wagger I could take anyone of them. I could kick their ass, at chess, or checkers, or even snakes & ladders.
The WCF is hoping that the testing will help to raise the international standards of the 'sport' (a term I use loosely) & hopefully help to make chess an Olympic sport in the future.
I'm sorry, no offense to chess players. I know its an extremely difficult game. It takes a lot of mental agility to play chess... & win. I know, I have a nephew who's been beating me since he was seven. However, that said, if chess ever becomes an Olympic sport, I will boycott the Olympics. I mean really. Table tennis is embarrassing enough.
(Side note, the IOC is also looking to recognise tug of war, yes you heard me, TUG OF WAR. A game you can play with your dog & a chew toy. But at least that's physical).
The Olympics is not a forum for mental competition. It is a test of physical strength & endurance. Hence, ancient Greece, the gladiators, the Adonis. They weren't sitting around playing chess, at least not in the arena. Maybe at home in their spare time, on the porch with the neighbour.
Are they trying to make a mockery out of the entire Olympic spirit? Well, at least I'll still have the winter Olympics, minus curling of course.
Just A Thought
Until one is committed there is hesitancy, the chance to draw back, always ineffectiveness. Concerning all acts of initiative there is one elementary truth the ignorance of which kills countless ideas & splendid plans:
Friday, December 01, 2006
World AIDS Day